Raising Adopted Children…

Raising adopted children is no different than raising your genetic offspring. However I recommend that one should do a few rituals for the spiritual cleansing of the adopted child. Spiritual cleansing is required for every child be it your own or adopted. But in case of an adopted child, it becomes very important. The reason is very simple that often times, we really do not know about the background of the adopted child, his or her biological parents, the circumstances in which it was conceived, and left on his or her own. If one has adopted a child of a relative or a known person, it is still OK to delay the spiritual cleansing ritual, but otherwise, it is advisable to do it as early as you can.

Why is spiritual cleansing so important?

The children at the orphanages or adoption agency offices are often times picked up or brought by someone in a bad shape. These children are in agony. They suffer a lot. Like any other soul, these tiny creations of God are thoroughly traumatized. This trauma leaves them with permanent scars on their soul. Though it is very difficult to remove such scars permanently from someone’s soul, still we can always take a few corrective steps to make the little ones comfortable in our loving arms.

If the parents (guardians) of the adopted child follow a religion, it is recommended that the rituals of that religion be followed. If the parents follow no religion then also there are a few rituals that can be performed to make the child comfortable in his or her new home. This is one ritual that can be followed by all, irrespective of the religion one follows or not, or even if it is your own child and not an adopted one.

Clean the house and swab all the rooms with salt water. Use plenty of yellow color for decoration in the form of flowers, upholstery, rangoli, crockery, or anything that is yellow in color. Yellow color symbolizes pure energy. You may consider lighting candles, using incense sticks for fragrance etc. Put some nice chants, or soothing, flowing music. Cook something nice, a sweet dish is a must have. You always have a sweet dish made for auspicious occasion right?

Bring the baby in the house with utmost love and affection in your heart. For infants, just one drop of salt water is enough. Even if you take a little salt water on a cotton swab, and wipe the palms and soles of the baby with it; it is enough. Please remember that their skin is too tender. They may develop some kind of allergy. So, do not be over enthusiastic in wiping with salt water. Just a little water, and that’s it.

You should keep yourself clean whenever you go near the baby. Make it a habit to wash your hands with soap and water before touching the baby. You may also take a bath with salt water, and rinse with plain water afterwards. While you take the baby for sleeping, make sure that you have enough time to be with him or her. During sleep, the baby can listen to your voice, and can feel your emotions, thoughts. So please talk about good things. Reassure your baby that he or she will have a very comfortable life with you. Such loving thoughts and words will slowly and steadily reduce the trauma scars from the baby’s soul.

The genes are very important for the growth of a child, and so is the environment the baby is being raised. You have no control over the genes of the adopted child, but you do have full control on the environment the baby will live in. Provide the best of sanskaars, the best of education—moral as well as academic. Help the child build a character that will help him or her carve a beautiful life for him/ herself in the later years of life.

I personally believe in spiritual cleansing for myself and my family members on a regular basis. We all have a salt water bath on every Sunday. And I wipe the floor of my house every now and then with salt water. I put morning and evening chants, Mantras and bhajans, and light a lamp (diya) in the morning and evening. It is very important to keep the atmosphere of the house positive and vibrating with golden energy. For this one should always learn to be happy, keep the negative thoughts away, lead a satisfactory and meaningful life, and try to follow certain discipline in his or her life. All these things raise positive vibrations in your home, and you feel happy and content.

My Dream Project...

Hello,

Under the aegis of http://www.spiritualkonnect.org, I am planning for a Social responsibility Project. This project will be for the Citizens of India. In short, the project is all about learning to take self –responsibility for all your thoughts, deeds and actions. The target group is all Indian, right from cradle to grave, to be precise.

I have huge plans of engaging schools, colleges, and everyone who wants to make a difference in making living in our motherland a better experience. Everyone, who enrolls for this project has to pay a minimum fee, and I assure you that it will be meager. This amount will be used in developing educational material for the masses, and also to print brochures, make button badges for the participants, toward the expenditure of volunteers, campaigning, and miscellaneous expenses.

The project is very ambitious, and I would love it even more if each Indian can join this project. This will help us craft the India of our dreams. I need the help from you in three ways—by participating as a responsible citizen of India, by donating additional money, if you can (in addition to the participation fee), and by spreading a word about this project.

I believe we can design our own world, by enhancing our awareness about a few issues, by taking responsibility of our deeds, and by paying forward to the motherland. Are you with me?

Please suggest some catchy Title for this project as well! I’ll need volunteers for designing of our Project Brochures, printing material, canvassing, advertising, making badges, distribution of various materials to the participating schools, colleges, offices, households etc.

I’ll also need you for your sincere efforts in transforming this “dream project” into a “dream come true project.” You may also suggest some other innovative ways to begin this project. If feasible, we will try to incorporate them in our planning and execution.

Thank you.

Warm Regards!

How to strengthen the Mother-Child Bond…

The mother-child bond is the strongest bond known ever since the birth of the universe. The easiest and safest way to strengthen this bond is by way of breast feeding your child. Apart from physical effects it has on the mother and the child, it has got great emotional and spiritual value.

Breast feeding time is a special time to bond with your baby. This is also the best time to deliver your thoughts to the unconscious mind of the child. I request you to please re-read the aforesaid sentence, written in italics. And after re-reading, ponder over it. Try to get the extract of the small yet very powerful sentence.

When you take your child close to you, you unconsciously deliver your thought vibrations to your child. Your thoughts, emotions, and energy signature enter the body(physical, mental as well as spiritual body) of the child. If you consciously control your thought process, and think only positive thoughts; your child receives all positive information and stores it in a form that helps it to reproduce it later in his or her life. If you deliver negative thoughts, anger, stress, frustration; the child stores it in that form only. With such negative information, your child may go through the same sort of feelings later in his or her life.

Instead of teaching your child about the stress and frustration in life, teach how to handle tough situations. Give solutions to problems instead of creating them.

To strengthen the bond between both of you, please do the following things:

·         Observe your child’s natural pattern of hunger, sleep, play time etc.

·         The new born babies sleep for most of the time, and are fed after a set duration.

·         With little observation you can set your timetable as per your child’s needs.

·         Keep some time dedicated to breast feeding.

·         This is the time for you and your baby.

·         Always hold the baby properly. See that the baby is not feeling suffocated.

·         Except a few cases, it is recommended that you feed your baby while sitting comfortably.

·         I suggest that the mother should not talk to anyone during feeding the child. The reason being, when we talk to someone, there is all possibility of getting into some negative thought cycle during the conversation. And remember, you pass on all your emotions to the child. Making derogatory remarks about someone, talks of taking revenge, or any kind of stress should best be avoided.

·         This may sound like a talk of the old times, but it is true. You give it a try if you want to! Please do not feed your baby in front of those who are obsessive negative thinkers. Sometimes, the baby just turns his head to the other side, and since it was sucking the breast, the flow of milk continues. Such people sometimes utter very negative things that may affect you and your baby. It is better to steer clear of such people while breast feeding.

·         If the baby is being fed by the surrogate mother, please make sure to educate her about the impact of the thoughts. It is recommended that even she should avoid all negative thoughts during breast feeding.

·         Looking at your child with compassion, stroking your baby’s tender head affectionately helps to enhance the bond between the mother and the child.

·         The best time to deliver positive emotions, love, compassion, positive thinking to your child is when you are looking at your child with utmost love, and moving your hand on your baby’s head with utmost affection. Your eyes glowing with love; and heart pouring out all love, compassion, and a feeling of oneness with your child; will make your child yearn for you. This will teach him or her value of love, sympathy, compassion, respect, and oneness.

·         After feeding, assign enough time for burping. The baby sucks in a lot of air during feeding, and it may trouble the bay later if it does not burp properly.

·         This is another time when you can deliver all positive vibes to your baby.

·         The baby is right close to your heart.

·         Every single stroke of love will enhance the bond between the two of you.

So, keep some time aside for this private time, and strengthen the bond that is the strongest bond in this universe.

How to tackle stress during pregnancy

Stress is the biggest culprit in anyone’s life; be it a pregnant woman or anyone else. Since I am writing posts related with pregnancy related issues, I would stick to issues related with pregnant women. The other factors of stress will be discussed later. I hope no one would mind it!

There are various causes of stress in a pregnant woman’s life. While some are external, most of them are essentially internal; at unconscious level. The external factors are family, friends, social circle, job, and medical condition during pregnancy. The internal factors are basically the thinking cycle of the women, her awareness and her ability to react or respond to a particular situation or event, and her ability to cope up with the outside factors.

While the physical stress like doing household chores, going to office, commuting etc. cannot be helped much, the pregnant woman can surely control her mental and emotional stress.

I come across many women who take unnecessary stress of their in-laws, family members, neighbors, boss and colleagues. Please understand one thing clearly that you cannot change others. If you wish to see a change, make necessary changes in your own self. People are, by large, made by their own past experiences. We really do not know why a particular person behaves in a particular manner. And again, we always try to understand the other person with our own awareness, our past experiences. Sometimes, a person says something else, but we understand something else. Many times, we are simply judgmental. We have our own opinion about a certain person; and we are not open to new ideas, new thoughts, and suggestions. We always think that why this person would think good for me; he or she will always think something bad for me. This may be true in some cases, but I am sure, it is not always the same. It is our own negative thought cycle that produces such thoughts in our mind giving unnecessary stress to us.

We think more on the lines of others conspiring against us, looking for an opportunity to trouble us etc. I suggest that the pregnant woman should always keep to herself. She is nurturing a new life. The child inside her womb is so helpless that it has to listen to all the thoughts and words of its mother. Every single thought and action, be it a happy thought or a sad one, be it a happy action or a bad reaction; it produces chemicals in the mother’s body. The child receives everything its mother provides, that to helplessly. The fetus has no control over what to take and what not to. It is exposed to so many chemicals that may actually harm it in all possible ways. But the baby inside cannot help it. It is the utmost duty of the pregnant woman to take care of her baby. If she cannot care for the baby while it is still inside her womb how is she going to take care of the child when it comes out?

Taking unnecessary stress is like bringing the filth from outside, and storing inside your house. The filth will obviously produce stink. Tell me, what else you expect filth to produce for you. Even if you spray some nice perfume on it; after sometime it will give out stink only, because that is its basic character, inherent nature.

Just leave everybody else aside. You should be concerned with yourself and your baby.

You may like to ask me, but how to tackle such stress. Good question indeed! In such a case, please follow the guidelines written below:

·         Do your spiritual routines religiously. This will give you endurance to face such situations with utmost grace and awareness.

·         Depend on self for most of the daily chores do may do.

·         Expectations from others will surely bring stress to you, better to avoid.

·         What others think and say about you is their business, and not yours.

·         Enhance your self-esteem, and love yourself, and love your child.

·         Do not let others rule your mind and life.

·         Set attainable goals during pregnancy. As the time progresses, your ability to do certain tasks will be reduced considerably. In such cases, ask for help.

·         Control anger pangs.

·         Refrain from watching movies that may produce any kind of stress.

·         Avoid negative thinkers. And this hold true even for the ladies of your social circle.

·         Avoid listening to the stories of abortions, miscarriages, or any other negative talks.

·         If you feel something different going inside, or you are not feeling comfortable; call your doctor immediately. Do not think of negative happenings all by yourself.

·         Every symptom counts in pregnancy; even seemingly small symptoms have everlasting effects on you and your child’s well being.

·         Do not delay asking for medical help.

·         Do not eat anything that you don’t feel like eating. And this does not hold true for your medication. Whether you like it or don’t, you have to take it religiously.

·         No self medication please. No granny medicines and great granny medication for you during three terms of pregnancy.

·         Feel fresh by going for nature walks, listening to soothing music, going to places of worship, going to spiritual discourses if you like them, writing poetry, painting, or by pursuing your hobbies or doing anything that interests you the most; but all without exerting you too much.

I am sure all my pregnant friends will take a serious note of this, and will be happy during and after their pregnancy. I wish my best!